Thursday, June 23, 2011

Whats with Today, Today?

I am in a super Shitastic mood today. I have been baby sitting all week, and it's been raining pretty much all week. I have been stuck in the house with a 12 year old, a 6 year old, a 4 year old and on varying days either a 3 year old or a 2 year old. I'm tired, and I'm hungry.

I have lost another pound which puts me at 190# Which is great, but in the same breath this little one pound loss at a time sucks. I want to see something a little more drastic and it's a bit discouraging. Especially when I see no changes except for the fact that the little thing on the scale slides forward one whole little line at a time.

I ended up eating a few brownies last night, and I loved every last bite, but then I fecking felt guilty. I want to just throw my middle finger up and just say "FUCK YOU! I don't care!" But Dammit I do care.

I've been virtually shopping for my upcoming trip for my 30th birthday, not actually buying anything, but looking over all my favorite stores and picking out all the gorgeous shirts/ dresses/ and shoes that I'd love to buy, but am to broke to actually purchase. Even though a certain somebody just put us even more in debt by buying himself a lap top.

Yep see. Shitty mood. Sigh.

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